Dede Wilsey has been brought up in an environment that is known for having money, control and power.  Her great negotiating skills and diplomacy come naturally as she is the daughter of the late Wiley Buchanan. Her father was the onetime U.S. ambassador to Luxembourg and Austria. Her maternal great grandfather, Herbert Dow, was the founder of the Dow Chemical Industry. Dede Wilsey grew up in Washington DC, surrounded by politics and wealth. This gave her the incredible sense of civic stewardship in addition to the sense of right and wrong. She married Alfred Wilsey, who passed away in 2002. Her husband was also a major philanthropist in San Francisco, who had a fortune from real estate and butter business.

The political skills of Dede Wilsey were picked up when she was a little child. This skill helped her during the project of rebuilding de Young Museum. Before moving to San Francisco, Dede Wilsey was a regular in the social columns of all the buzzing news papers.  She received a lot of press coverage when she made her social debut in 1961. The Town and Country magazine had put her picture on the cover and named her the spirited Connecticut College student debutante of the year.